Category Archives: home

July 9, 2014 · 7:23 AM

Hot and bothered…

I’m busy and I’ve run out of pre-written or partially composed blog posts, or rather ones that aren’t just one big fatass rant.

It’s been hot and humid and I thought I could deal with it, but it’s been ramped up lately to tip me over into full brain and body stupor.

(The air conditioning in my car is broken and we don’t have any at home yet).

I actually had a bee in my britches a couple of weeks ago and it stung the sh*t outta me.

A bite in the ass does not make one work harder.

I’m sure lighting a fire under it will have the same negative consequence.

Out of some weird mid-life moment, I actually joined Facebook with my real name and it sucks… though I get to bully the old bullies back by choosing not to “friend” them back, but then I feel bad even though they sucked and made me feel like hell in the seventh grade.

The seventh grade is the seventh ring of hell.

I only had about 70 kids in my grade for all 13 years (kindergarten included) and I can’t remember 70% of them.

I’m getting PT for my knee and the place plays this “oldies” station that is the music from my formative record-buying years… it’s kinda freaking me out – too much of my past all at once.

With the near end of the World Cup, I am overjoyed to quit cable television and hope it nestles into its own hell ring.

I’m getting a lot of spam comments on this blog and it’s annoying the piss outta me.

I’m almost finished knitting a medium to largeish-sized project, recently sewed a small project, and thinking about ways to spruce up some ugly hollow sliding closet doors – we’ve got two sets of them…

I also just started to spin a bit for the Tour de Fleece.

I will finish up this disaster from last year.

(One bobbin spun backwards, I cut my thumb while spinning the next, and it’s been picked up and put down too many times to count.)

I also want to spin some other things I didn’t get to last year.

I can’t find those at the moment though…

3 Comments

Filed under home, spinning

Tagged as bad knees, bee stings, bitching, hot and humid, Kromski wheels, Pigeonroof Studios, spinning, Tour de Fleece

July 2, 2014 · 7:45 AM

Don’t try this at home…

The thing about living in a small town really close to a little impoverished city (but also close to giant rich cities) is that our libraries suck. I’m originally from a midwestern state which had a very progressive library system and a whooping budget to support it. When I moved to my old city, it was full of incredibly beautiful library buildings, but so-so collections. Here? The buildings suck and the collections are downright pathetic. (Our town’s library is a nice little old space though). But that also means books aren’t thrown away or checked out often, so N was able to bring home a mother lode of decorating books from the late 1940s and early 1950s.

I dove in looking for period-appropriate color guidance and decorating ideas for our house of the era.

I’m all for creative re-use and never discarding something until it is truly and utterly useless.

I like old sh*t and prefer to own things that existed before me.

I don’t like fine antiques that need to be minded and not often used in my own living spaces, yet I know not everything belongs in a museum.

But this?

Good god, it makes me cringe.

Maybe I should put it into perspective – I’d gladly hack apart something from the 1980s because to me it isn’t old and there is still plenty of it around…. so that’s probably how someone felt about their 30-year-old furniture in the 1940s. However most of what we had 30 years ago is total sh*t and made from particle board and other unhackapartable things…

I should pause before I go into a very long-winded rant and sob story about a lovely old apartment I once inhabited with built-in cabinets, a lovely and still perfect deep cast-iron enameled bathtub, and solid and well-patinated hardwood floors only to have it entirely gutted by a new owner who wanted to make it “nice.” It wasn’t – she made it all beige and full of synthetics and she should have been thrown in some sort of prison for her destruction and wastefulness and lack of any amount of aesthetic sense.

Too many DIYers and paid “designers” are ruining the souls and characters of our old homes.

Our house isn’t that old, it’s from the 1950s, and a style I thought I’d never live in and don’t love, yet I’m keeping the good useful parts as they are, and I’m looking at ideas from the era to keep it from becoming too disjointed from its past (hence my dilemma over the knotty pine paneling) I feel that the original owner (yes even a phantasmic one) should walk into a home and see some familiar elements.

I found a few useful tips I could agree with though – I love a close lamp (and you certainly wouldn’t want to singe your yarn…)

2 Comments

Filed under home, home decor, recycling

Tagged as antiques, DIY, home improvement, i hate particleboard, remodeling, ruining old furniture, ruining old houses, sawing off feet

June 25, 2014 · 7:53 AM

Not quite as old as a rock

I recently had one of those stupid decade-marking birthdays.

I’m mostly okay with aging – I’m not fighting it with dyes or potions or knives – but I miss my younger self, rather my younger ache-free self.

On this particular birthday, we went for ice cream and the teen behind the counter flirted heavily with N, but called me “ma’am”* very pointedly and twice – normally I’d address that with amusement and mild contempt for the youth of today, but it stung a bit this time. And on that day I also accepted the fact that my knee had gone to hell and wasn’t coming back any time soon.

So it’s a couple of weeks later, and I’ve been banned from hiking, stairs, ladders, and hills (we live on a hill for christsakes). I’m bummed and it’s slowed down the progress on the house and curtailed my typical summertime activities. Another downer is Italia going out of the World Cup. I’m not much of a sports fan, but I can commit to something that only happens every few years. In order for us to watch the matches though, we had to buy cable TV. I hate it. I thought we’d try to get our money’s worth and tried out a few of the channels with those ghastly home flipping/shopping/designing shows and in the end, I just want to forget it all happened…

I know the people on TV aren’t quite real, but those houses do exist, and the dumpsters of utterly wasted materials are very real too. Granted, tragically awful aesthetics and very broken things need to be addressed, but walls being knocked out for mega-refrigerators and perfectly fine stone and ceramic being smashed and tossed rather than extracted for re-use, or left in place makes me want to vomit.

Stone is ripped out of the earth and shouldn’t be a trend.

It should be banned altogether or require some sort of hoop jumping to get it, but not in an exclusive sense to make it more in demand.

We recently stayed in another fine old hotel, and I was happy to find that they retained the possibly original pink marble floor. The rest of the bathroom was done up in the latest trend – including a clashing granite sink top cut in a stupid shape for the stupid sink, but the floor was just lovely because of its age and it came from the days things stuck around a bit longer.

I’m thrilled we can cancel the TV now (but the World Cup also offered up some premium knitting time).

*We don’t live in the south or within a community where ma’am is a sign of respect – here it’s hurled at no-longer-young ladyfolk in sneering tones…

Don’t get me started on Mrs…

2 Comments

Filed under home, home decor

Tagged as bad taste, counters, countertops, environmental disaster, flipping, granite, hgtv, historic hotels, home improvement, marble, mutant strawberry, pink marble, re-use, snakeskin, waste

June 11, 2014 · 7:23 AM

Knot or not?

I’m adamant for leaving some original details in a home, but I’m having a terrible time deciding whether to keep our knotty pine paneling or paint over it.

This is one of the few times I wished the previous owner painted over something so I could just throw up my arms and say oh well, stripping it would be a nightmare and involve chemicals, so I’ll just paint over it too.

And in theory, I could paint it knowing that it would be possible to restore it later by stripping it, but who would?

I could also preserve it by drywalling over it, but that would involve either renting a truck or having the drywall delivered, and that would cost more than a gallon of paint and primer (and I know, maybe two gallons of primer, the really heavy-duty kind).

I really hate early American decor, country style, rustic/primitive/PA Dutch stuff, and I’m not a fan of the cabin look unless I’m in a cabin. Since we’re in a place with lots of trees and birds, it does often feel that we’re in a cabin, but then when we go to cabins it would feel like we didn’t leave home, and I want to feel like I’m in a cabin when I’m actually in a cabin, and when I’m home I like light open spaces.

We’ve also got some cheap 1970s fake wood paneling that I’m miserably attempting to fill in with spackle (more on that later) and have no regret “ruining,” but the pine is giving me pause…

It also begs for questionable colors in the pea soup and snot families…

9 Comments

Filed under home, home decor

Tagged as 1950s decor, 1950s house, green, home improvement, knotty pine, knotty pine paneling, orange, original details, painting, painting knotty pine, paneling, pea soup, snot

June 4, 2014 · 7:36 AM

Oh deer…

We’ve had a new neighbor hanging about recently.

And she kindly ate some of the poison ivy still left after I pulled out an entire garbage bag full of the evil vines.

She’s under my “office” window now, looking up when the phone rings; and earlier, rather creepily stared at me as she took a piss. Perhaps she thinks that part of the yard is hers now, which is fine.

I’m glad I never ended up using any of the nasty chemicals I got to kill the ivy – I worried about the stuff getting into our well, but she would have been affected by it too, if not more so?

But she’s also a kick in my tired ass that the garden needs a much taller fence…

Not to mention I also need to revive said garden… but I knew we wouldn’t have enough time this year, so we renewed our CSA subscription with the liked/hated organic farm… more mutants to toss down the pie hole!

…as well as fresh herbs once more, thankfully.

The kitchen also got some freshly sewn curtains – the doe can’t spy on me now…

(at least in that room).

2 Comments

Filed under home, sewing

Tagged as deer, doe, doe a deer a female deer, fauna, fences, garden, lawn, wildlife, yard

May 21, 2014 · 2:49 PM

Poisonfuckingivy

I love that I have a nice big yard in which to putter and prune.

I love discovering all of the things previously planted, blown in by the wind, or sown via bird ass.

I love walking barefoot outside (except when I think of ringworm).

But I utterly despise, loathe, fear, hate, wildly shake my fist at Poison Ivy.

It is everywhere.

Believe me, I looked when we first inspected the house – not a hairy perverse vine in sight – but it was winter. Now it isn’t, and I’ve found it’s as populous as Dandelions – delicate little tendrils that snap when pulled and sink back to maniacally multiply.

I am exceedingly dermatologically allergic to that leaves of three bastard.

Despite the thorough and methodical precautions I took for my first attempt to remove it, it still got me…

And there is so so so much more…

And I just might have to loose a lovely Azalea that it’s gotten way too cozy with and started naming their evil offspring…

Death to Poison Ivy!!!

4 Comments

Filed under home

Tagged as allergic, allergy, anger, evil plants, gardening, itchy, lilac, poison ivy, poison plants, rash, vines, yards

May 14, 2014 · 8:41 AM

Trend cringe…

I don’t follow trends in fashion or home decor or electronics or cars or diets or, or, or…

And I don’t usually like what is trendy anyway.

I like certain colors and color combinations and sometimes they pop in and out of popularity, but never has the popularity merged with my need to buy.

I bought a huge wool rug for a song in 2007ish – normally I don’t go for stuff that looks like it came from stores like Ceramics Shed or Box and Bucket, but I like yellows and greys and greens and browns and of course wool, so I got it for our then large green and yellow dining room. But now it fits best in our living room, with brown furniture and soon-to-be yellow* walls. But we need curtains, and we need really wide curtains, so making them seemed like the likely option, so I ordered some fabric samples.

Then I went to the obnoxious store named for the thing at which you shoot arrows for something dumb and little and unavailable in our little town, and there were so many yellow and grey and ikat-like patterned things everywhere…

I don’t like that – I usually go against the tide – my home decor and self-presentation usually make people who follow trends cringe and look at me pitifully, and that’s the way it should be – I don’t like them, I don’t want to be like them. My car is from the ’90s and isn’t an SUV, shopping is not a hobby, I hate big-box-made-in-china-inflated-prices-for-low-quality-sh*t-especially-things-called-designer-but-just-generally-suck, and I know that in itself makes me a stereotype and stuffed in another big bag of the same folks, but at least it’s smaller one – a biodegradable, non-bleached, organic, waxed paper one perhaps?

In the end, I found cheap linen curtains that will have to do for the meantime, so I just ordered a little of the ikat fabric for some pillows.

*Oh holy hell, I can’t find a good pale mustardy yellow paint!!! They either look to lemon, or too grey, or too orange (I like orange, but the dining room is likely to be an orange variant) or shite under artificial light, or shite under natural light…

3 Comments

Filed under home, home decor, sewing

Tagged as brown, color choices, fashion, grey, home decor fabric, ikat, living room, not yellow wallpaper, rugs, sewing, trends, wool rug, yellow, yellow and grey, yellow paint

May 7, 2014 · 9:55 AM

A sink hole…

We’re at that point in the house work where we’re finally seeing progress and remarkable change, but feeling utterly exhausted and in all kinds of pain.

I miss knitting a little in the evenings, but I just can’t do anything remotely detail-oriented or delicate with my hands at the moment.

And despite a daily shower, I still carry with me some of the wall colors.

But the painful parts are often unexpected and are the main factor to curtail any leisurely handiwork.

Our weeks-long back ordered kitchen sink finally arrived and we installed it immediately (and oh so securely) only to find it was defective. The drain hole was more oval than round. We called the big blue and yellow Swedish store and complained. They said they were already made aware that a batch of them were defective and the new ones (also back ordered) likely would be as well.

I’m tired of doing dishes in the bathroom sink. I got through the first day or two pretending to live in a seedy flophouse full of beat-down musicians and washed-up artists, then felt thanks that my ancestors were the tenement dwellers and not me (not yet).

So I tore that Domsjo a new one.

After more than an hour of aggressive filing, and several bruises later, the hole became round enough.

(In the end, we still had to call a plumber to hook it up, thanks to the previous owner’s pipe-y hacks.)

I’m thinking how I’d like to put the previous owner and a certain blue and yellow big store in a sink hole right about now…

4 Comments

Filed under home, home decor

Tagged as bad owner, bruises, defective sink, DIY, domsjo, farmhouse sink, filing sink hole, home, home rehab, house, ikea hack, ikea sink, money pit, painting, patching, plumbing, reaming, sink hole, sinkhole

April 23, 2014 · 8:00 AM

A masterpiece on which to tread

I’m no artistic genius either.

I went to art school and thought I’d become a famous painter and lead a fascinating jet-setting life.

One problem though…

I was a lousy painter.

Things would start off okay, then I’d over-work the canvas, then I’d try to fix it, then it was a total mess.

By my second semester, I’d wisely switched to another medium.

My parents even took down my paintings over a decade and a half ago – a few years with them was enough of a struggle.

But I’ve still got a painter’s cockiness and swagger. I think that because I understand color and texture and shape and design, I can conquer any visual task – even a painterly one.

This is the only instance I have of over-confidence.

I’m also cheap.

And I like old sh*t.

So when I saw what was under our unfortunately rather new, but horrid, fake wood floating floor in the kitchen, I exploded in glee to see the original Armstrong linoleum floor in “Tuscany Tan” spatter pattern, c. 1954.

Then I pulled up more to find a hole the size of a Spaniel in a very conspicuous area, so I called a flooring guy to write up a quote for new linoleum.*

The cost for the new stuff nearly made me come in contact with said floor, but we could make it work by buying the cheaper versions of some other things in which we intended to splurge.

We pulled up the rest of the floor last weekend… and the rest of it was good!

A few hours later found me in the craft store buying oil paints.

(I can’t find my 20-year-old mostly unused paints at the moment – maybe I gave them away?)

I filled the hole with wood filler, sanded it, and started to make my trompe l’oeil masterpiece.

Only it was really, really off.

Naples yellow hue is really just beige, and my green needed to be mixed with some blue, so I went back to the store for a couple more tubes.

And then I got to the point where I started overworking it.

And then N became a backseat painter.

He almost became painted and feathered (or sawdusted).

And in the end, it is convincing enough.

I need to scrub off a little more of the yellowy wax build-up in the surrounding area (which I should have done before I painted) and with a few coats of sealant, it should be even better?

We still have another floor guy coming out to give another quote this week just in case…

Oh, and rugs, right? One of those will help it even more!

But really, this is better for all even if it isn’t perfect – being “green” is most effective when you can keep what you’ve got. I’m able to donate the ugly but still perfectly use-able floating floor to a charity building organization too.

*Linoleum is not vinyl, it’s made of linseed oil, and is historically appropriate and “green.” This also does not contain asbestos as did other similar resilient tile flooring before the 1980s.

8 Comments

Filed under art school, home, home decor, recycling

Tagged as 1950s floor, 1950s kitchen, art school flunky, conserving linoleum, green remodeling, linoleum, oil paint, painting, restoring linoleum, spatter pattern, tuscany tan, vintage floor, vintage kitchen